LongHorn Steakhouse

You flip open the menu expecting something that matches the confident, ranch-hand energy of the place and instead find a greatest-hits playlist of the most generic American wine names in circulation. Canyon Road and Red Rock are doing the heavy lifting here, which is a bit like asking a gas station sandwich to anchor a steakhouse dinner. It's not offensive, it's just absent of any real ambition.

The list leans almost entirely on California and Oregon — safe, recognizable, no surprises. You've got your Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, Pinot Noir, Chardonnay, and Pinot Grigio covered, which technically ticks every varietal box a chain steakhouse needs to tick. La Crema Willamette Valley Pinot Noir is genuinely the one wine here that belongs on a real list — it's a name worth knowing and a step above the surrounding company. But one credible producer does not a wine program make, and everything else reads like a national beverage distributor made the call and nobody pushed back.

Glass pours start around $8–$9 and top out near $9.79, which feels reasonable until you consider what's in the glass. The Red Rock Malbec by the glass is the most commonly cited option and it's exactly what you'd expect: inoffensive, fruit-forward, and built for volume not distinction. There's no evidence of any rotation or seasonal updates to the glass pour lineup — what you see today is what you'll see in six months.